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The Queer Southern Wedding I Didn’t Need to Throw

Posted on January 8, 2018
A photo of Sasha Lamprea and Natalie Arrevalo's queer southern wedding.

I spent most of 2017 planning (and secretly dreading) a queer southern wedding.  My partner and I were together for nearly seven years before getting engaged, and a full eight before the actual wedding. We went through undergrad, grad school, four apartments, three cats, two dogs, countless trips together, an infinite number of laughs and tears, and more than a handful of awkward family moments before getting to the alter. …

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An AIDS-Free Generation: Fighting HIV With Social and Racial Justice

Posted on January 5, 2018
An illustration of social and racial justice.

As an HIV advocate, I know that my success is rooted in my resiliency. Rooted in my courage to stand up for all people, regardless of race, gender, sexuality, or socioeconomic status. Rooted in my persistence to have the tough conversations others avoid. Conversations like the fact that we will never achieve an AIDS-free generation unless we embrace and advocate for social and racial justice.…

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Asking for a Friend: Out of The Closet and Into The Streets?

Posted on December 20, 2017
An illustration of coming out of the closet.

Dear Queer Comrade, Coming out is a huge journey. Whenever I talk to people about their coming out experiences, I always ask first how they came out to themselves. Coming in to your own truth is the hardest journey of all. Sometimes we come out to ourselves and immediately tell the world, and other times, we don’t, won’t, or can’t—and that is more than okay. Here are some ideas to help you navigate this chapter of your coming out journey.…

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Holidays in the Aftermath of Harvey

Posted on December 13, 2017
A photo of gay Houstonian Ian L. Haddock after Hurricane Harvey.

Six days into Hurricane Harvey, things hit me. I was living in a motel room provided by FEMA with only a few sets of clothes, the photos I could grab, and my laptop. The space was decent and clean, but my heart was cluttered with the fear of the unknown. Don’t get me wrong, I’m resilient. Like thousands of other queer-identified people, I have been homeless before, couchsurfed many times, and learned to do whatever it takes to survive. It is…

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Yuletide Pride: A Queer Guide to Surviving the Holidays

Posted on December 6, 2017
A photo of queer heart lights for the holidays.

Happy holidays! Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, and a Blessed Yule to all! With all of the hustle and bustle of these magical winter festivities, it seems impossible to feel alone. Yet, as queer folks, many of us often do. Sometime between Thanksgiving and the New Year, the feelings of loneliness and isolation begin to creep in. If we are single, have strained relationships with our families of origin, or are struggling with our identities, these feelings can be…

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Living by Choice: My First HIV Test

Posted on November 27, 2017
A photo of Russell Etherton sharing his story about his first HIV test.

I try and live my life by choice. My first HIV test, however, was in reaction—reaction to a love story and a partner I thought I knew. Once upon a time, in a gay land far away… I vividly remember the day I met my ex-boyfriend. Like so many of my friends, Grindr was how I found “connection.” I opened the app and, in the endless scroll of faces and torsos, I’d find someone who would quench whatever thirst I had that…

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Asking for a Friend: Six Queer-Friendly Dating Apps That’ll Make You Swipe Right

Posted on November 24, 2017
An illustration of dating apps.

Greetings queerios, allies, and friends! In this special edition of Asking For A Friend, I’m going to take you on my personal tour of dating apps. I frequently get asked which dating apps or sites I recommend and, to be honest, I don’t often know which ones are the most “in” at the moment. But, as a relationship expert, sexologist, and a single-and-ready-to-mingle woman, I decided to dive in and share my digital dating experiences. Full disclosure before we begin: these…

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Yes, I Still Eat Chick-fil-A

Posted on November 22, 2017
An illustration of gay Chick-fil-A.

The boycotts we engage in largely serve to elevate our own egos, as people think, “Look at the good I’m doing in the world by rejecting the hate chicken.” Plus, it’s not that hard to choose another fast-food restaurant off a U.S. Interstate where they dot feeder roads like weeds. But it’s almost unthinkable for liberals to picket Apple—especially when they have a magnificent pro-LGBTQ record. To add another dimension, we mostly boycott companies that only negatively affect the domestic…

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Landline: An Introduction to Gay Porn

Posted on November 17, 2017
A photo of an introduction to gay porn.

The door slides open, and I hop down the steps and onto the street. The school bus drops me and a few other kids off at the entry to our neighborhood. The cement feels soft beneath my new Sketchers. Mother bought them for me last weekend. After pay day, she took me to the Payless and let me pick out a new pair. She said my last ones needed to be replaced because they had gone to hell. The other…

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