By Autumn Rendall
In Houston, a city that over two million people call home, finding new friends can be quite the overwhelming task. And of course when you’re queer, it feels as if your odds of meeting that special platonic someone are even smaller.
Marissa Ramos, a graduate student at the University of Houston, has made the search to find a local queer bestie a little bit easier with “Queer Friends Houston,” an Instagram page where queer people can meet new fellow queer friends in the greater Houston area. “I don’t care if you’re an art hoe, an anime queer, or a dyke on a bike, I want you to be in my space and in my community,” Ramos says.
Queer Friends Houston has a simple approach: you DM the page with your name, location, and a short bio, add a picture or two, and Ramos posts the submission. Then people can follow, DM, or send you a comment, and start getting to know you from there.
Part of Ramos’ inspiration for the page comes from her own early college days. When she reflects on that time, Ramos thinks about how hard and disappointing the journey to making queer friends was for her. “Whenever I think of new Houstonians looking for that queer community and feeling lost and stuck, that almost brings me to tears because it reminds me of that time [in my own life],” Ramos says. “It was just really hard to meet queer people. The queer people that I did meet, loved, and became close friends with lived so incredibly far away.”
To keep the page as accepting and welcoming as possible, Ramos has put a few guidelines into place: you must be age 18+, queer, and based in or frequently spend time in the greater Houston area to submit.
Queer Friends also strongly upholds the page’s anti-racist, anti-transphobic, anti-fatphobic, and anti-ableist agenda. If anyone uses discriminatory language, they are immediately blocked. Submissions from non-white, trans, and disabled folks are also prioritized. “Those things are at the forefront,” Ramos says. “It is a radically inclusive space.”
Ramos says she believes one of the biggest obstacles to queer Houstonians finding friendship is transportation, especially if you live outside of the Loop. Since Queer Friends has a variety of submissions from all over the greater Houston area, you’re bound to find someone a hop and a skip away.
People are also encouraged to list their hobbies, interests, and anything that makes them unique in their bio. Ramos says she’s seen a lot of friendships spring from the page simply because of a common interest. In one instance, Ramos says, two friends hit it off because they both happened to be Brazilian, queer, and looking for a friend with whom to speak Portuguese.
In the three months since its launch, Queer Friends already has over a thousand followers. Scrolling through the posts restores faith in humanity, as the comments are an array of queer Houstonians supporting each other’s creative works, styles, and interests. “Everybody’s out there just looking for a gaggle of gays,” Ramos laughs. “That’s the truth.”
Ramos says that this is only the beginning for the page, and hopes to find even more ways to build healthy queer communities in Houston. She also aims to start hosting meet-up events, where followers of the page are able to connect in-person and in a LGBTQ-friendly environment. “I’m looking to keep up with that momentum and see what’s next,” Ramos says.
Since the Queer Friends page is quickly growing, and graduate studies are certainly no light load, Ramos is also on the hunt for someone to help her co-moderate Queer Friends. If interested, or if you have any ideas to contribute to the page, send a DM to Ramos or Queer Friends.
